The Bible tells us that “he who finds a wife finds good and obtains the almighty favor of God.” Proverbs 18:22! It also tells us that women should love their husbands and be submissive to them. (read I Peter 3:1-5). Well, if that’s the case, then why do men and women seek satisfaction in things or people other than their spouses? I can’t speak for men, but I can be the voice of a woman who loves her husband unconditionally. I have learned that no matter what has happened in our marriage or what he has done, I can only be responsible for what God wants me to do or be as a wife. That was a hard pill for me to swallow for a long time, and we’ve been married for almost 10 years.

I am a strong black woman and always will be, but that doesn’t mean I am weak because I choose to obey God’s word and give my husband respect, honor and love. I realize that my hope, calling and eyes have to be focused on Christ! If I seek him out first, whatever else he needs will come to me. Notice the word “need.” The bible tells us in Philippians 4:19: “But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” God has an eye on us and knows what we need and when we need it. We just have to walk in his Word no matter what is going on around us. It’s not always the easiest thing to do, especially when a spouse isn’t doing what we think he should be doing or what God’s word says he should be doing. God will take care of them and because he honors marriage so much, he will work it out for his good and no one else’s.

Wait on God to give you the victory because the battle is not yours anyway. Remember this, if your husband doesn’t love you, wait on God! If your husband is not making love to you, wait on God! If your husband is having an affair, he waits on God! If your husband doesn’t respect you, wait on God! If your husband doesn’t spend time with you, wait on God! If your husband is not punishing the children, he hopes in God! If his husband is not managing finances properly, wait on God! If your husband likes porn, wait on God! If your husband is an alcoholic or a drug addict, wait on God! If your husband is a party animal, wait on God! If your husband masturbates instead of loving you, wait on God! Just don’t stop praying, fasting, believing, having faith and asking God for deliverance for your husband and your marriage.

What I am going to tell you next is difficult, but I promise you that if you can focus on these things, God will bless you and your marriage tremendously:

Don’t just love your husbands, be in love with them!

Don’t just support your husbands, stand up for them!

Don’t just pray for them, pray with them!

Don’t just have your children, but be there to help raise your children!

Don’t just encourage them to succeed, but encourage them!

Not only arouse them sexually, but make love to them passionately!

Don’t just lift their spirits when they’re down, but give them a lift if needed!

Don’t just cook their food, but feed it to them if they want or need you to!

Don’t just read the word, but study it and apply it to your life every day!

Don’t just say you’re a godly wife, walk/talk/live it every day!

God wants us to have godly marriages that glorify him, so he will make sure that we can overcome the obstacles that sometimes easily beset us in this daily walk. I encourage you to meditate on obeying God’s word daily. It will help you be the strong black woman of God that you were meant to be!