Digital Marketing

Change for change: Internet of things will be the same in 2016

Over the years we’ve seen some crazy devices released by some of the most valuable corporations in the world. Some call it, “The Second Digital Revolution,” only instead of sweaty workers of the proletariat, we’re talking about people with computers tinkering with the devices and coming up with a clever marketing slogan for it.

According to analysts, the Internet of Things is expected to generate $1.26 billion in 2016 and claims that the Internet of Things will reach the top of the mountain. For those who don’t know, the Internet of Things is a collection of everything geeks would love. Software, programs, sensors and a whole network of computer paraphernalia to make new gadgets. Most of these are innovations and new technologies supposedly made to make our lives easier.

Sounds good right? Except now, manufacturers are shamelessly slapping WiFi and Bluetooth on every device they find, giving it a fancy name, telling the press it’s a “modern marvel” and calling it finally. I bet two engineers are giving each other a high-five in some factory for every device they put a WiFi connection on.

One such example is a company’s attempts to put an HD sound system in a coffin. Literally installing speakers in a coffin for the dead. Do you know what I thought of myself? “Finally, a coffin that can play Taylor Swift in a full loop at maximum volume. I’ve been looking everywhere for this.” When it comes to building a perfectly constructed home, what you really need is WiFi for your light bulbs, security alarms on your fans, and cameras on your speakers.

Okay, that’s not to say that the entire Internet of Things is bad. They are more lazy than bad. Take, for example, a water droplet monitor and its ability to hear running faucets and toilets. At the end of the day, it’s just a walkie-talkie. There’s nothing inherently “revolutionary” about it. Which serves as a bitter act of disappointment, because change and revolution is what I expected.

The same goes for Philips Hue Lights, which took the CES stage by storm when it was first announced in 2013. The internet lost its collective mind and everyone, along with their moms and dads, stared at color-changing bulbs. After that, they all followed along with WiFi refrigerators, bolt-connected doors, and even remote-controlled coffee tables. Little do they know that they are just chasing their own tails in an infinite loop, stuck in revolutionary limbo.

That being said, not all improvements and innovations are weak or bad. Google’s announcement of its newest Chromebook, in partnership with Samsung and other tech corporations, is great news for anyone waiting for the next Chromebook innovations to pair with their Android phones. In other news, cloud computing’s efforts to improve its weak and susceptible security systems are also commendable. Then you also have Google Chromecast and its more portable and practical design, made to cater to all travelers. Or, you have CISCO Meraki’s newest MX product line which is believed to be the most advanced security system and their WLAN products that offer high speed internet coverage. They are all smart and necessary innovations and breakthroughs, for sure. But sweet mother of pearl, they’re just peanuts compared to what we really need. Is not sufficient.

Not all are winners. Some of them are just a resounding “NO”. Yes, I’m pointing you to WiFi-enabled talking toilets. Justify yourself. If it’s real. An engineer had the audacity to connect an Internet connection to a bathroom. While you’re doing that, I’ll just adjust my human vs. animal detector security camera It’s not as bad as WiFi while your poop is flying around, but come on, if you have a home security camera, do you really need the visual aids and AI to tell you that your baby isn’t a cat? Come on, it’s like the device is insulting my intelligence. I can barely see it, “Hello human. You are too inept at distinguishing between an animal and a family member. Let me point out what that object was.” Bright.

If you want to buy these IoT devices, that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with that, but as far as common sense goes, there’s no particularly compelling reason to do it either. Instead of tackling a real problem, manufacturers are digitizing a simple household object for digitizing sake. I need a trash can to put the trash in it. Not to remind me that I have thrown non-recyclable things in it. That is the responsibility of an individual, not the machine.